The 25 Funniest Things Said By Great Musicians

Music should always be about doing the stuff we like, make it fun and have fun doing it.

Cole Porter

Cole Porter

“My sole inspiration is a telephone call from a producer.”

Jean Sibelius

“Musicians talk of nothing but money and jobs. Give me businessmen every time. They really are interested in music and art.” – Jean Sibelius, explaining why he rarely invited musicians to his home.

Kirke Mecham

Kirke Mecham
“Only become a musician if there is absolutely no other way you can make a living.”

Gustav Mahler

Gustav Mahler
“Don’t bother to look, I’ve composed all this already.” – Gustav Mahler, to Bruno Walter who had stopped to admire mountain scenery in rural Austria.

Frederic Chopin

Frederic Chopin
“I really don’t know whether any place contains more pianists than Paris, or whether you can find more asses and virtuosos anywhere.”

Richard Strauss

Richard Strauss
“Never look at the trombones, it only encourages them.”

Claude Debussy

Claude Debussy
“In opera, there is always too much singing.”

Gioacchino Rossini

Gioacchino Rossini
“Oh how wonderful, really wonderful opera would be if there were no singers!”

Bing Crosby

Bing Crosby
“I think popular music in this country is one of the few things in the twentieth century that have made giant strides in reverse.”

Frank Zappa

Frank Zappa
“A ponderous orchestral absurdity.” – Frank Zappa on his rock symphony debuted by the Los Angeles Philharmonic.

Louis Armstrong

Louis Armstrong
“All music is folk music. I ain’t never heard a horse sing a song.”

Angus Young (AC/DC)

Angus Young AC/DC
“I’m sick to death of people saying we’ve made 11 albums that sound exactly the same. In fact, we’ve made 12 albums that sound exactly the same.”

Igor Stravinsky

Igor Stravinsky
“My music is best understood by children and animals.”

Leonard Bernstein

Leonard Bernstein
“To achieve great things, two things are needed: a plan and not quite enough time.”

Thomas Beecham

Thomas Beecham
“There are two golden rules for an orchestra: start together and finish together. The public doesn’t give a damn what goes on in between.”

Freddie Mercury

Freddie Mercury
“If I didn’t do this well, I just wouldn’t have anything to do…I can’t cook, and I’d be a terrible housewife.”

Jimi Hendrix

Jimi Hendrix
“I’ve been imitated so well I’ve heard people copy my mistakes.”

Jeff Beck

Jeff Beck
“After I saw Jimmy [Hendrix] play, I just went home and wondered what the f*** I was going to do with my life.”

Jim Morrison

Jim Morrison
“Actually I don’t remember being born, it must have happened during one of my black outs.”

Bela Bartok

Bela Bartok
“Competitions are for horses, not artists.”

George Harrison

George Harrison
“I’d rather be a musician than a rock star.”

Duke Ellington

Duke Ellington
“I never had much interest in the piano until I realized that every time I played, a girl would appear on the piano bench to my left and another to my right.”

Keith Richards

Keith Richards
“Let me be clear about this: I don’t have a drug problem, I have a police problem.”

John Cage

John Cage
“I can’t understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I’m frightened of the old ones.”

Bob Dylan

Bob Dylan
“Colleges are a lot like old-age homes. Except that more people die in college.”

Paul Simon

Paul Simon
“I’d like to thank Stevie Wonder for not doing an album this year” on winning the Grammy for Album of the Year in 1975 with “Still Crazy After All These Years.” Wonder had won that same award in both 1973 and 1974.